Dear Military Spouse (My #1 Advice for You)

So you’re married (or dating) a service member.  Congratulations, and welcome to the family!

marine wives

Life in the military is different.  It has its ups and downs, it’s adventures and hard times… but it’s an adventure I wouldn’t trade for the world.

There is so much I want to share with you about this world.  From deployments to military moves to connecting with other spouses to building your career, etc etc…  But I’ve decided to start with the best piece of advice a military spouse can have and a theme that will pop up again and again throughout your time in the service:

Get to know your best friend: Flexibility.

Flexibility, flexibility, flexibility.  Did I mention, flexibility?

As a service member, your spouse is U.S. Government property.  It’s hard to hear, but they own you.  Both you and your spouse, as a team, have made the decision to serve the U.S. military in whatever capacity they need you.  That means being pliable to where they tell you to move, live, work, raise your kids.  They determine how much BAH (Basic Housing Allowance) to give you, the amount of weight they’ll cover in a move, when to deploy your spouse…

This isn’t easy.  As human beings, (especially if you’re female), we have control-issues.  We like to have (or think we have) control over our lives.  Here’s one of the many instances of where our time in the military has grown me into a better follower of Jesus:  control is an illusion!  It’s a facade.  It’s Satan’s way of fooling you into thinking that you are Lord of your life and that you actually have control over your health, your job, your marriage, or your savings account.  When in reality, God can alter any or all of those things in an instant. Don’t be so fooled to believe that you have more control over your life than the One who created all things.

That being said, the sooner you realize Who is in control of your life, the easier your time in the military will be.

Flexibility, flexibility, flexibility.


Current military spouses out there: how have you grown in flexibility during your time in the service?

6 responses to “Dear Military Spouse (My #1 Advice for You)

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